A Description of Codependency/ [ Enmeshment ]


My good feelings about who I am stem from being liked by you.

My good feelings about who I am stem from receiving approval from you

Your struggles affect my serenity.  My mental attention focuses on
solving your problems or relieving your pain to the neglect of my own.

My mental attention is focused on pleasing you

My mental attention is focused on protecting you

My mental attention is focused on manipulating you to do it "my way"

My self-esteem is bolstered by solving your problems

My self-esteem is bolstered by relieving your pain

My own hobbies and interests are put aside. My time is spent in sharing
your hobbies and interests.

Your clothing and appearance is dictated by my desires, as I feel you are
a reflection  of me.  Your behavior is dictated by my desires,
as I feel you are a reflection of me.

I am not aware of how I feel; I am aware of how you feel. 

I am not aware of what I want;  I ask what you want.  If I am not aware, I assume.

The dreams I have for my future are linked to you.

My fear of rejection determines what I say or do.

My fear of your anger determines what I say or do.

I use giving as a way of feeling safe in our relationship

My social circle diminishes as I involve myself with you.

I put my values aside in order to connect with you.

I value your opinion and way of doing things more than my own.

The quality of my life is in relation to the quality of yours.